I’ll Be Loving You

Below is a video, one of my first attempts at editing, along with the caption that is below the video on Youtube.  My husband, Lee, and I will have been married 41 years on August 7th, 2017. I am in disbelief at times how fast the years have flown by. There are times, of course, we struggled and still do, truth be told, but commitment to one another and to God is the key to lasting relationships. I honestly cannot imagine my life without the love of my life.  Have there been times I wanted to throw in the towel, oh, yeah, but God would remind me, after I would complain to Him, that if I wanted peace in my life, that I needed to forgive and to bless.

One thing I have learned and experienced concerning love over the years, whether it is in a marriage or with other relationships ; true love is God centered, it is based on ‘action’ and not on pure emotion. It’s always a choice to love, especially when others have wounded us deeply. It’s not easy.

The pictures of family and friends captured in this video below, only tell a partial picture. In spite of the seemingly carefree and loving environment depicted here; it was not always so, though there were undoubtedly good times where we laughed and loved, there are also countless untold memories of heartache, disappointment, and hopelessness (not just for me, but for all involved at various times).  As I watch this video again, my heart is overwhelmed with gratefulness for God’s Presence in my life. He promised to never leave us, nor forsake us.  I am also very grateful that a loving God sees past our human frailty, sinful nature and our faults (our imperfections) and has made a way for us to experience His forgiveness, love and peace through His son Jesus.

 

 

“Through the Good Times and the Bad Times, God is Always Faithful. As Christians, we cannot really learn to love until we’ve learned to forgive others, ourselves and even God. I have had to repent many times for not walking in love and forgiveness. There is NO LOVE like the love of our Savior, Jesus…and He is calling us, as Christians, to take the high road as the scripture says below, to lay our lives down for Him, and that means to let go of all bitterness and hurt and let God come in and heal our hearts. He is calling the sinner to come and rest and experience the Greatest Love of all time, Jesus, the Lover of our Soul. There are too many broken hearts. I do not regret the storms of life…for in them God has shaped and molded me and I desire above all else to have a pure heart and follow His ways, not because I have too, but because I Love Jesus. This is dedicated to my wonderful husband who is the love of my life, and a special thank you to my friend Sean who made it possible for me to learn to make video’s…and especially to my Father in heaven, and my VERY best friend Jesus, the Lover of My Soul.

Joh 15:9 “Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. 
Joh 15:10 “If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. 
Joh 15:11 “These things I have spoken to you so that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full. 
Joh 15:12 “This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. 
Joh 15:13 “Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. 
Joh 15:14 “You are My friends if you do what I command you. 

Special thank you to Dave Gregoire, Jenni Springer and LadyJane Fontaine for the use of some of the pictures…I appreciate it..”

On the Political Side (Vander H. Atwell)

This is an article (opinion piece) from‘View From the Bottom Rung’ written by my father, Vander H. Atwell, for a local Arkansas paper. Though he writes about many things pertaining to life, and his growing up in Arkansas, and America, he often delves into the political side. I don’t always agree with his views, but the majority of the time, I certainly do. He’s old school, and was Democrat for many years, until as a logger, the ‘activists’ began to put ‘pipe’ bombs and slash tires for whatever cause they felt justified in doing so. It is, in my opinion, NEVER okay to bring harm, destruction or possibly death to any fellow human being when protesting.  He is always a gentleman, well thought out, researched, and has watched in his lifetime, the spiraling down of the American way of life, as  our government began to take more control over the lives of it’s good citizens (both Democrats and Republicans have had a hand in this one way or another). You may not always agree with him, and that’s okay, but it’s a great article, worthy of reading. 

June 24, 2017: Arkansas News

The time has come the Walrus said, to speak of many things, of shoes and ships and sealing wax, of cabbages and kings; and why the sea is boiling hot and whether pigs have wings. (Credit Alice in Wonderland.)

Seventeen years ago when I first picked up a pen and endeavored to put together a couple of sentences that made some sort of sense and incorporate them into a paragraph with enough coherency they might make it to the public comment page of the local paper, the invitation was for timely social topics, community news and views, the rule of conduct, no cussin’ and no private vendetta’s made public.

In reality the theme drifted to mean spirited attitudes, the premier topic, state and national politics interjected into the small rural venue by a culture of liberal activists up from metropolis to a person against any industrial development that might grow the city and offer jobs to a habitually economically stressed community.

Ideological lectures on a scale that would do an evangelical proud dominated public comment and in order to color (or discolor) local culture and politics, the newly arrived often brought lawyers along to litigate their complaints in courts of law.

If anyone ever wandered onto a ‘scene’ unawares, well that was me: how the new arrivals described the community, the people in it, and, indeed the world in which we live was one I failed to recognize, the outpouring of contempt against the “local yokels” sunspot hot. When the editor gave place to a conservative columnist, the discontented not only flooded editorial with protests, they confronted the papers editor and demanded the column be taken down.

It’s like that with volatile people who somehow find themselves politically isolated within cultures not to their liking, and with ideological firebrands, as here in Arkansas, a state which over the last couple of decades has slowly morphed from a Democrat cant into a Republican leaning society. This constant shifting of political fortunes is historical, represents the American experience and is accepted as part of the territory by a mature citizenry long accustomed to political grounds shifting beneath their feet. However, not so much the liberal “apparachiks” who live and die by the sword. Liberalism is the new “fire and brimstone religion.”

Arkansas is a case in point: The more Arkansas morphs from its traditional shades of blue to tinges of red, the more extreme the vitriol slung at the good folks of the state and those they choose to represent them. I believe this thesis can be supported by searching out the chronicles of the more vociferous of leftist advocates lying within the archives of several northwest Arkansas newspapers. Those who aren’t being heard (fail in their attempt to halt the trend) tend to elevate exponentially, both the decibels of their voice and the bitterness of their complaints often reverting to muckraking tactics in an effort to discredit the leadership of any political association crosswise of their own; public rejection of their political doctrine is not only unthinkable, it is personally devastating.

None of this is to say that criticism of Republicans is never warranted, or that the whole “kit and kabootle of them” should be sainted; rather, that the Republicans large evangelical memberships with its strict adherence to time honored principles of personal conduct affects the party’s ethical standards in ways that are not so “detrimental” to the fortunes of the Democratic Party. Christian philosophy calls upon its adherents to strive for betterment daily, admits to human frailty, that everyone “falls short of the glory,” and that every man-jack of us are in constant warfare against a carnal debility that exists within humankind’s own nature, a philosophy grounded in a set of ethics and principles that is the primary voice evangelicals bring to the cultures and associations that they support or with which they align. Democrats not only ignore their own shortcomings, tend to dismiss that they have any, and actively propagate that Republicans are inherently evil, a cancer on our society whose initiatives will or “may” result in the deaths of thousands of American citizens.

There are, to be sure, Christian elements within the Democratic Party, but that ethic is counter balanced by groups that are virulently anti-culture and anti-Christian. And while it is true that good men and bad men are found across the political spectrum, Democrats are not so much defused by a diverse clientele less religious, and less enthusiastic of Christian concepts.

But View From the Bottom Rung drifts more to philosophical musings rather than hard-core political activism, therefore will not ‘muckrake’ by researching and reporting the party affiliations of Washington bureaucrats and lawmakers whose legislative initiatives may kill millions. Neither will it search out Democratic miscreants that have run afoul of the law; rather, since we are all of one nature as Christian philosophy advises, one suspects both sides of the aisle are well represented. Yet one also suspects that, facing the same charges, more Democrats get off the hook for crimes large and small, than Republicans do and for the same foregoing thesis: Democrats are far more loyal to the brotherhood because they do not claim, nor are they held to the same restrictive code that tends to hinder more ‘robust’ competitiveness within the Republican enterprise.

Without attempting to rewrite history, does anyone at all doubt had Nixon been a Democrat he would have went down so easily, and that, with a hefty assist from his own party? Democrats stick together like a swarm of bees protecting the queen. Count on it.

But View from the Bottom Rung does not intend to become a “bash the Democrats” column. We see enough partisan opiners, both sides of the aisle, who diligently search out the sins and misadventures of the other party while ignoring the rascality of their own. Loyalty to one’s own associations is an admirable thing one supposes, but in fact amounts to a shallow conscience indeed if it detracts from accountability to the association which binds us together and to which we pledge allegiance.

Differences of opinion aired in a public forum and processed at the voting booth is the hallmark of our society. Evil is not a part of that equation. But grievances of evil motive against other “faiths” for the sole purpose of political gain is not only an unethical activity, it is an immoral and dangerous one as well as recent events would suggest, especially if that recriminatory stance has been institutionalized by the association that finds it a benefit to its political interests. Eventually some suckered idiot will believe it and act on it.

It happens time and again, eventually some propagated soul(s) ignorant of the concept takes a gun and “goes hunting,” or feels justified in donning a mask and taking to the streets in defiant protest of authority and in fits of violent and destructive activity. Ironically, it is Democrats who have actively cultivated the suspicion that Republicans are a volatile association, that they are prone to volatile elements that present a threat to society and that their policies and initiatives will cause thousands of Americans hardship, heartache and death.

But it is that very, twisted narrative along with an SAS 7.62 assault rifle, an assassin carried onto a ball field in Virginia and took “justice” into his own hands by acting upon the liberal spin that Republicans are out to destroy the lives of millions of U.S. citizens, strip them of Social Security and starve to death countless old people, puppy dogs and little children.

One cannot teach hate without messing with the minds of hateful people. That fact is made transparently clear in the caustic rhetoric of partisan news organizations and the imputation of evil purpose by Democratic lawmakers into conservative thought, and of the entertainment industry with its classless exhibitions of assassinations and beheadings; all of which served to create an atmosphere of social hysteria that contributed to the attempted assassination of a dozen Republican congressmen by a distorted soul driven mad by the cacophony of it all.

Some are hoping that the attempted assassination of Rep. Scalise and fellow congresspersons will result in a sober reflection by both Parties, of where the white-hot heat of partisan rhetoric is taking us and expressing hope that the incident will usher in more respectful attitudes and cooperation. When pigs grow wings.

But virulent rhetoric is a fundamental tool in the Democrats seven-month effort to subvert the Trump administration, a road with no apparent end; it’s not likely to change anyways soon but the fact that members of both parties now feel threatened by the violent fallout of unbridled vitriol may serve to dampen the rhetoric and encourage a little civility. Maybe its time the conversation departed the boiling hot seas of political acrimony and drifted to such mundane topics as ‘shoes, ships, sealing wax, cabbages and kings.’ If the “Donald” can wax conciliatory in the wake of a politically inspired assassination attempt, perhaps there’s hope that others may also.

The Lighthouse

A few years ago, I started learning to edit video’s (by no means am I an expert but a few were special to me). I will feature some in my blogs. This was made during my trial and error time, so others could have done better, as I said, I am no expert, but this particular video spoke volumes to my heart and spirit.

The video features Kimberly and Roberto Rivera : a song called ‘Amore’. They are singing in the spirit. I found this clip when I went looking for sea animals (dolphins, whales), while desiring to do another video for a friend. This came to me as I was searching and I knew I had to attempt to do a video with this song about Jesus, the Lighthouse. There have been times in my life, where the waves of despair and sorrow have threatened to overtake me, to leave me in a state of hopelessness: no light in sight, sinking, desperately clinging to God’s Word and His Promises .  During these seasons, where my faith was being tested, it was as if I was standing on a quagmire of  shifting sand, flailing at times, trying to stay above the water as not to drown. Had it not been for the mercy and grace of my Abba Father, the loving support of family and friends, and my faith in the Lover of My Soul,  Jesus, I would surely have succumbed to the darkness I felt swirling about me.

It has always been JESUS  I clung too that finally led me to safe harbor even in the midst of the storm; He has done this time and time again in my life. There will be smooth sailing for awhile, and then another storm will arise, such is life. Thank God there is Joy in the journey, and it’s not dependent on our circumstances! There are many scriptures in the Bible telling us of how Jesus is the Savior…the Light of the World. What a tragedy if the ships ignore the lighthouse or cannot see the light…and crash upon the rocks and lives perish. King Jesus is the One that will guide us to safety and will lead us to heaven. He and ONLY He is the Light of the World, and when we are going through the ‘storms’ of life…He has promised to be with us, to guide us and keep us safe.

 

The LightHouse

 

Blogging as I Go! Lord, Help Me! lol

The last two weeks I was fighting a terrible sinus infection and am just now beginning to feel somewhat normal. What is normal for me? That’s debatable, and depends on who you talk too, some I dare say, have me in the ‘she’s really different’ category.  Suffice it to say,  in my ‘normal’ state it’s challenging enough for me to figure out the technical side of things: in a brain fog trying to get my thoughts organized and in the direction I want to go is excruciating. In fact, I am currently reorganizing some of my menus and categories which will be my main task today. It’s been helpful to me to view other seasoned bloggers and take note how they (or you) are organizing your blog site. Better I try and do this now, and backtrack a bit, than wait til I’m 100 blogs in or more! So, please bear with me as I continue to press in.

One of the changes I am going to incorporate is to change the Menu ‘blog’ (how original, right?) and relabeled it Heart2heart, because that is very much what I am all about; connecting with others. I have a desire to share my family history, but I also have many things on my heart and in my own life that I want to get ‘out there!’  It’s something that has been stirring within me for a long time; sharing my life experiences, my spiritual journey, and in doing so encouraging others along the way.

The label Vander H. Atwell, will host stories or musings and opinions my father has written over the years as a guest columnist for various local newspapers where he has lived, and lives currently. I would like to feature some of his ‘bluegrass’ videos, and blogs relating to this aspect of his life under his label also.

Precious Memories, will be mostly about my family growing up, family history; Atwells (daddy’s side) and Ramey’s (mama’s side), and the last few years after mama and daddy moved back from California to Arkansas. I have thousands of pictures and video’s…but I have to figure out how to do this in an organized way. Pray for me…;)

Well, that’s it in a nutshell, happy blogging everyone, as I can and time will allow me, I do like to come around and read what you have to share, and I have found some great and interesting bloggers. It’s beginning to come together! I’m still trying to figure this blogging thing out, but I’m closer to my goal than I was, and for that I’m grateful.  I just keep reminding myself, “You Can DO it!”

Addendum:

Just added a Love Lifted Me menu, which will feature scripture, encouragement, worship (I love to worship, and I have been and am currently a worship leader along with my husband).

Gallery was added also. I most likely will add grandparent pages to that as I go along.

 

Come All You Weary

Isaiah 40:30-31

30 Young people will get tired;
    strapping young men will stumble and fall.
31 But those who trust in the Eternal One will regain their strength.
    They will soar on wings as eagles.
They will run—never winded, never weary.
    They will walk—never tired, never faint.

 

Song by Rita Springer

If this valley and These shadows stay
If broken wings can bring you praise A promise made
But never came Can show me your unfailing grace
Can light the dark And find my way

If ground and grave Can steal my heart
Yet when you save A new song starts
And just your name Can move me near
Can change my hope, cast out my fear
I need… more Of your breath here

You are my Hallelujah
You are my Hallelujah
You are my Hallelujah
You are my Hallelujah

When silence falls And then remains
When worn and bruised, I still can raise
My voice to make You famous still
All of these tears, upon your feet
Become the wine You taste in me

Van, the Mandolin Man

When I was a little girl I remember daddy buying one of our first pieces of furniture (I say that with a smile, not sure how mom felt about that)…a blonde Fender Guitar and Amp. From that time on he was hooked. He would practice all the time, and over the years he eventually traded his electric guitar in for a mandolin, not that he stopped playing the guitar entirely but the mandolin became ‘his’ instrument of choice. He began playing with some country fella’s in California but it seemed ‘bluegrass’ was what he really loved. I remember some fellas and a couple of gals, gathering around mama and daddy’s small living room when they lived in California; banjo, mandolin, bass fiddle, acoustic guitar and fiddle all joining in the fun. He traveled the circuit and played as often as he could at different events and venues around the surrounding areas.

When my folks decided to return to Arkansas, after living in California for over 50 odd years (mama called it their last ‘big’ adventure), daddy had no trouble finding others to play bluegrass with. His younger brother, Billy, played bluegrass as well, and one thing led to another and soon daddy was off and running. I wish I knew this song they are playing, but suffice it to say we all had a great time that night, and the highlight for me, was of course my mandolin playing ‘pappy.’ My sister once said to me, (both of us having no appreciation for bluegrass or country much when we were growing up), “Listening to daddy play bluegrass is kinda of like having a spiritual experience.” I’m not sure about that, but I got what she meant as only sisters can and do.

View From the Bottom Rung (by Vander H. Atwell)

Vander H. Atwell is my father. He is soon to be 84, and pretty spry for his age and downright puts me to shame. Longevity runs in the family, the oldest member of his family is 90 years old, my Aunt Pluma, then there is Aunt Oleta, and Uncle Billy. Daddy, is the third born. He is a widower, and now a newlywed by about a year at the writing of this. He is an amazing man, not perfect, and there are a few things we don’t agree on, but he is and will always be my ‘hero’. He’s a writer, philosopher, professional quality mandolin player, retired logger and mountain man, and more. I love him with all of my heart, and if you can’t tell I’m bursting with pride.

He writes an opinion piece called ‘View From the Bottom Rung’, at least twice a month for a local paper in Arkansas, The Press Argus. Though it can sometimes be political in nature, he most often writes about life, and especially how it was days past. He was born in Arkansas around 1933, the third born out of four siblings, two older sisters and one younger brother. His father, Roland Atwell, a Baptist Preacher, and his mother Minnie ‘LaRue’ Atwell, were also farmers and lived in Crawford County, in the vicinity of Mountainburg, Arkansas. In those days they would have been called ‘Hillbilly’s, which was not considered a compliment by many. Today, it’s often associated with Bluegrass music and good ole, down to earth country folk, pot lucks and so forth. In fact, I am quite proud of my ‘hillbilly’ roots and the wonderful people I call ‘the salt of the earth’ kind of folk.

My father, upon finishing the 8th grade, did not return to school, though I know not why,  I would assume it was to help out at home and the family farm. I think it always bothered him that he had not continued on in his education at the time, but it actually spurred him on later to take educational courses through the mail. He is a natural born story teller. When he writes, he often paints a vivid picture of how it was as a young ‘lad’ back in the early days of his childhood. His lively hood until he retired several years ago was that of logger, timber faller. He grew to love the mountains of California, and much like a professional sailor longs for the sea, my daddy still , at times, longs for the mountains. My siblings and I were able to visit the camp sites at times growing up and I still love the smell of the pine trees in the mountains. One day I hope to compile many of my fathers writings and stories and put them in book form. He’s a brilliant man. I will share more about my mother and father in the days ahead. It will be random as there is so much. I will highlight my fathers various articles, and other writings on my blog as well as feature video’s of his musical past time.

The following was written by my dad and posted in the Press Argus Newspaper, on April 29, 2017. As I read this,  images came to my mind as if I was watching the movie ‘Old Yeller’ as I envisioned a much younger boy growing up in a very different time and era, running through the backwoods of Arkansas. You can find the article if you google it…but I was unable to get the link to work…(still a newbie on here unfortunately).

By Vander H. Atwell  

Arkansas in springtime is a beautiful place to be. Yes, it amazes that even through the stifling heat of its sweltering summers, the timbered hills and spreading flatlands retain their prideful green luster. in all my 55 years in Northern California surrounded by the state’s vast evergreen forests, nothing like the constant and consistent sea of green that is Arkansas in season.

Even though the Lady’s beauty endures through the scorching summers of the hot humid U.S. South, there is an extra special richness of color in the state’s springtime awakening; a soft, lush chlorophyll driven glory that reflect the miracle of birth and the promise that comes with renewal of life.

How I loved those idyllic times when the budding of my own life blended with an Ozark spring; lazing in a sea of cool green grass gazing up at pillowed clouds wandering like sheep against a backdrop of deep blue sky. Small islands of “pushups” (miniature flowers of white, pink and blue) thrusting themselves up through a soft green blanket spread out over hill and dale, various insects crawling or flying about, most of them new to the world as me, scurrying about in their industry much too preoccupied with their own society, their own exclusive little universe to pay attention to mine.

It was not the spreading blanket of green or patterns of miniature flowers growing thereon that caught the fancy of my faithful sidekick “buster” the family dog who always seemed at my heels on those idle moments I wandered about soaking up the wonders of the earth ‘neath my feet and the heavens skyward of my searching eyes: It was an ant or some other creepy crawler scurrying just beyond the forward thrust of his resting paws that caught his attention and ‘bugged’ him no end.

The dog lay quietly at first, adverse to confrontation but as the insect charged his position, shifted ever so slightly and was soon intently focused on the critters determined industry shifting his head side to side, wrinkling his brow in puzzlement as the cerebral processes became increasingly stressed. Most times creepy crawlers were allowed to pass without incident, but other times, depending on the dog’s patience, or lack of it, came a snap and a bite in which case the unfortunate interloper was caught up and spit back out in a somewhat wet and disheveled condition.

Buster was a brown mixed breed male that showed a pit bull lineage. His first years were prone to terrifying seizures, or “fits” as we called them back then, but eventually outgrew them and by the time I was 6 to 8 years old considered the tenacious beast invincible and trusted him explicitly. A nervous sort exploring the countryside alone might find himself a bit intimidated but not with the pit trotting alongside exploring every brush pile rabbit hole or rock fence along the way. The tenacious animal once tackled an upset Hereford bull that walked through a fence onto our property, grabbed an ear and survived the ‘ride’ bruised but not beaten. Often pranked by his young human pals yet always forgiving, in my time, for my time, my Lassie, my ‘Old Yeller’ together exploring the mysteries of a world only recently discovered.

By my calculations, I was 5 years of age when my parents settled on the narrow Boston Mountain spine called Burkett Ridge; in those distant times the “world” consisted of two 20-acre plots joined, one belonging to my father, Roland Atwell the other to my mother’s uncle, John LaRue. Neither of the plots was ‘move onto’ properties at the time of purchase but had acreage ready for cultivation and room for expansion into parts of the land not yet cleared of brush and trees.

Each built a two room log cabin, the material to build including logs and wooden shingles for the roof were taken from the surrounding forest; the windows, glass and frame, ceiling and flooring of tongue grooved pine boards about the only pre-processed material used in the construction.

The kitchen took up one full room, cooking was done on a cast iron wood burning stove while heat for the un-insulated shanty was a light-weight sheet metal wood fueled stove called a King heater. The King’s thin sheet metal sides were often forced red hot in an effort to warm the airish two-roomer, especially on those frigid days’ temperature dropped so low it produced ice crystal skies, buckets of drinking water froze solid during the night and dampness inside the house turned to ice-glazed walls ere the dawning. Stoked to such intense heat the King burned out over the winter and each following autumn had to be replaced with a brand new store bought. No direct heat was had for a two-room lean-to added to the house later on: air conditioning to relieve the misery of the sweltering dog days of summer was doors left open.

The worse the misery of a cold hard winter cold, greater the joy of springtime.Rebirth of stubbled fields began with miniature wildflowers pushing up through seas of new grass; it came with the arrival of butterfly meadows, lush foliage of newly leafed forests freshly painted with the green pigmentation chlorophyll tempered with a dusting of yellowish pollen; the freshness, the wonder of it more than compensation for being cooped up inside for weeks on end by winters wicked bite the cold misery of evening chores and sleeping beneath tons of quilts and blankets while the sweep of cold nighttime winds wearied one to sleep with weird vibrations, mysterious rattlings and ghostly whispers from the dark cold abyss.

Sanitary conditions were nigh onto primitive those first years on the ridge. The positive of it, was that the immune systems of the ‘hill people’ were so robust from exposure to various vermin any disease that attacked was at serious disadvantage. Got sick you ‘rode it out’ on the back of ancient remedies handed down generation to generation. One survived albeit, not much for the relief of pain and suffering endured.

Not only was there no running water in the old “cabin on the hill” there was no well from which to fetch it, rather, spring water from a robust “seep” a couple of hundred yards down over the slope back of the house. Inconvenient at the least since water for drinking, cooking and bathing had to be carried a distance up-hill in two-gallon zinc buckets or in empty one gallon Karo syrup cans.

Eventually a well was sunk back of the house and beyond it an open-side storage shed/chicken shelter. The shed, constructed of scrap lumber, was used as a place to discard used-up junk that might later be salvaged for heretofore unseen purpose and to accommodate the dozen or so yard hens that served the table with both eggs and meat.

Later still, ‘volunteer’ peach trees sprouted and grew from seeds thrown behind the shed, which, betwixt the shed and the foliage afforded a bit of privacy to replace that lost as the old outhouse, set off a ways to the western most side, weathered, withered and finally collapsed into the ground.

There were other than the comforting presence of an old dog, and a stretch of grass mixed with low growing flowers on warm and sunny afternoons to occupy the time of a lad newly introduced to the general creation. Nearby was a section of ‘new ground’ cleared for cultivation the year before, or the year before that. In springtime a field of small “saplings” grew from the stumps and roots of cut trees and each spring before planting time, the acreage was brushed, sprouts cut, piled and burned ere a plow point broke the ground or the plot given over to pastureland.

The springtime ritual of cutting, piling and burning was a favorite chore, if any labor at all might be viewed favorably by a youngster who’s feet coveted the freedom of game trails, and whose hands sought their own creative devices. Rather the mind drifted to the idleness of day dreams and adventure; amongst the sprouts we cut, piled and burned were saplings forked at the top, excellent to cut and use as slingshot stalks (back when automobile tire tubes had the ‘snap-back’ elasticity of real rubber) and from short pieces of budding hickory shoots one could unsheathe his old ‘Barlow,’ slip a section of bark and carve himself a wood whistle slick as store bought.

Wicked little darts were made by attaching a needle like pin and paper rudder, (fore and aft) to a matchstick, a ‘tractor’ that moved on its own from an empty spool of thread, a piece of bar soap, matchstick and rubber band, a Jews Harp of sorts from string and a small pliable branch. Ground snakes, lizards, salamanders and June bugs were a part of a lad’s youthful distractions, foraging for dew berries, black berries, huckleberries and black haws, part of the action.

As my youthful friends and I grew older the more daring became our adventures the more dangerous became our creations. How we survived climbing trees, scaling rock outcroppings, swinging like monkeys through stands of persimmon, jousting wasps and exploring snake dens may be best attributed to providence. Looking back, how else to explain it?

Today the honey locust over the back fence here at my home in Alma blossoms the whitest of white while, in stark contrast of color, swarms of large black bumble bees the size of a mans thumb gather pollen. Beds of Iris’ ring the lower yard roses dominate the upper, a low cover of small orange wildflowers push themselves up through a cover of Irish green lawn. An ideal place for a boy and his dog to while away a lazy summer afternoon.

Yes, we may dream our way back to yesterday and yearn for worlds of un-ending springtime: but the old dog is gone, the time of making slingshots and whittling whistles past: The magic of the seasons is still there but then was then and now is now and lawns have to be mowed.

Peace

Do you have peace? Do you ever wonder if true peace is even attainable? When I was a young teenager and a new Christian, I once said to my father, that we can have perfect peace. He just looked at me and said, “Perfect Peace,’ is not possible. Young and inexperienced, I felt a little deflated, and perhaps a little intimidated. Understand, daddy wasn’t much of a church goer at the time even though he had grown up in a strict Baptist household, his daddy being a preacher. I think he was skeptical and a bit disillusioned with the church overall from his own personal experiences. Walking away from my father that day, my heart sank, a feeling of hopelessness tried to overwhelm me. I NEEDED to believe that God would give me peace, and lift the oppression and depression that had settled on me a few years earlier when I was diagnosed with Juvenile (type 1) diabetes at the age of about 12 years.

Leading up to the diagnoses, I had all the tell tale signs of having diabetes. I drank lots of water and my thirst was NEVER quenched, I lost weight, dark circles under my eyes, and overall moodiness. I remember clutching my daddy’s side, probably leaving a bruise, as we went to the lab to have blood drawn. Little did I know needles, labs, Iv’s, hospitals, and doctors would become a way of life for me. Laying in the hospital bed that first night, my mom and dad and other family members staring at me, with mournful looking faces, I was hardly able to acknowledge them. The doctor said I was lucky to be alive. They shoved books into my face that talked about losing limbs, shorter life expectancy, blindness and finally at one point I just shut down. Fear gripped my heart and my life: fear of dying, fear of losing a limb, fear of going blind, fear of not being able to have children, fear of needles etc. etc. etc. The carefree days of childhood were essentially over and the stark reality was more than I could bear at times. It took years for me to walk in the freedom and peace that I walk in now. I haven’t totally arrived, but I thank God this was not and is not the end of my story…

At that time, though, the depression was getting worse, and I remember crying at the back of my maternal grandmothers house, unable to describe the unbearable pain that was in embedded deep in the hollows of my heart.  The tears were unstoppable. She took notice but did not press me, and even if she had, I would not have known how to answer.  I am certain, that once I had left for home, she got down on her knees and cried out to God on my behalf. How grateful I am to this day for those powerful prayers. A few years later, at the age of 16 years old, lonely, feeling isolated, angry and miserable, I came to know, through a dear cousin, the Prince of Peace, Jesus. She took me to a meeting in Redding, California, and for the first time in my life, I had a supernatural encounter, face to face, with Jesus. I felt His Presence physically and emotionally that day.  My spirit came alive! Joy came into my life, and I began to experience the Peace that passes all understanding (Phil. 4:7). I began to understand through the ensuing years, true peace was and is always about trusting in Jesus, through the good times and the bad times. My peace came by looking full into His face: staying focused or centered on Him, by talking to Him (prayer), listening to Him (quiet contemplation), reading His Word,  being obedient to His Word, and through praise and worship. Philippians 4:7 says it best: and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Isaiah 26:3…”You will keep the peace, a perfect peace, for all who trust in You, for those who dedicate their hearts and minds to You.”  (The Voice) Bible Copyright © 2012 Thomas Nelson, Inc.

I decided many years ago, after our first child was stillborn (8lbs 4oz) due to diabetic complications, that when trials or tribulation came, I would ‘run’ to Him not ‘away’ from Him. I would choose to look to Him, to worship Him regardless of my brokenness. To surrender to His Love and Mercy. There is Peace in knowing Jesus, as John 14:27 says…27 Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.
As I sat and listened to this video today (as I have many, many times over the years), I felt such a peace come over me. There are so many looking for peace today, for many it’s a false peace, some kind of Utopia, or perfect world. We will NEVER achieve that here on this earth, but as the darkness begins to get darker, we can be assured, as believers, if we KEEP our eyes on Jesus, He will never leave us nor forsake us, and we WILL walk in supernatural peace that the world knows not of. Much love and prayers…Karen